I saw a few nice dancers perform, but they didn’t rely on technique or ability to win us over – they had to top it off with in your face cheese that approached on arrogance, which was a total turn off for me and the other dancers. I rarely saw elegance or mastery of any technique.

The other awful part was having to sit through really awful performances. There is no standard – it just seems to be about taking in money. Sure pay your entry fee, dance, and get a trophy. I’m glad the performers learn about performance – but overall, I find it to be unimpressive. Maybe this is a sport but it is certainly not art.

As a pro, the people hiring you don’t care about the awards you’ve won or what judges had to say. Competing is fun, the feedback can sometimes be helpful but in the end it will not make or break your career.

If you fear you might miss performing, why not look for other ways to do this? If the school you’re training at offers performances, do those. You might even use the time you’d normally be at competition to expand your performance and educational experience in other ways… audition for dance opportunities or musical theatre productions, attend workshops or intensives, look for master classes at colleges or see what nearby university dance programs have to offer in the way of classes or even performing groups open to the community, see performances by professionals.

Hope that helps! Best of luck to you

Other than this, all you can do is give your best. There are many factors in choosing members of a team. Team organizers look for ability and experience and also for people who work well with others. They may also have only a few slots to fill or be looking at things like your height, your “look,” or other things you can’t control. (rarer with high school teams but it happens). Also auditioning itself is something you get better at with experience. If you don’t make the team the first time out, try not to take it personally. Do work and practice to improve your skills, take class, learn if possible what you need to work on, and then try, try again!

If the audition or selection process is as fair as possible (dance is subjective – no way around that), if those rewarded with a slot on the team are those who work hardest and/or are the top, most qualified performers, and as long as those in charge are not intentionally making students not quite ready for the team feel bad, then competition can actually be really good practice and a learning experience for young people.

I do think, though, that teachers need to be sensitive and careful that they are not excluding or ignoring students who aren’t or are not interested in dancing competitively. Beyond this, you are responsible for how you feel about not making the team and what you’ll do about it. A “no” is a chance to step up and work hard to improve and be ready for the next audition. Otherwise, it’s okay to not be into it enough to take that next step and be happy to enjoy dance recreationally rather than competitively.

I will email you with a detailed response soon and say that anyone watching the comments that is wanting to respond is welcome. My brief response is that helping your daughter sort out her goals and true interests in dance will be important in making your decision and I will try to help you do that. Since she is only 8 there is no decision that can’t be reevaluated in a year or two.

There really is competitive dance for all levels Amber. Some schools choose to compete dancers simply for the experience of competing while others encourage it as a springboard to a career. As Melin mentioned just above, competition is not the only route to a profession in dance. If you are looking for a school that competes, go back and read over some of the comments to this post. It may help you fine tune what you are looking for and also weigh some of the upsides and downsides. You may also want to check out this post about setting goals in dance in order to find the right school and instruction.

Best wishes, Amber!

P.S. Melin, I’m sorry I didn’t comment earlier but your response hits very close to my own feelings about competition – it is just one portion of training – an elective. I am wary of the importance and weight that is frequently given.

Many dancers tend to be perfectionists. I am one myself and it is a real struggle sometimes to balance and cope with the resulting tendencies. I came across an interesting download that might give some insight. As I read this, I found some areas with which I fiercely identified and others not as much so the same may be true for your daughter. It offers some ideas about how you might help your daughter cope… breaking her goals into manageable pieces, studying up on “successful” people or idols and recognizing that they are often marked by setbacks… there’s more. Some or all of these might help your daughter work through her negative or perfectionist thoughts. As I reread the article, I realize how closely it relates to the Helping Dancers Deal with Disappointment article I just wrote on the blog. It was a connection I hadn’t necessarily made before! Anyway, here is the pdf. I hope you find it useful.

As for whether or not you’ve made the right decision, you might want to ask yourself if she shows this nature in dance only or if it is in other areas of her life as well. If it is dance only then you may need to ask why. And ask her specifically– Why does she think she gets so upset? What is she saying to herself when she spirals downward? Why is it so important to her? A lot of dealing with perfectionism is learning what is crucial and what isn’t… to a perfectionist everything is crucial. They need help working through what is (in reality) necessary for the task. If she gets into the cycle you may need to be the one to say enough – this could mean just refocusing the energy toward another activity, taking a breather with something she can feel more relaxed about, taking a break from competing, or leaving the environment alltogether. There isn’t a right or wrong – all you can do is continue to try and understand and talk through the options with her.